COMMUNICATING EFFECTIVELY 121
Defensiveness Survival required that we learned to hear danger approaching, but today humans have translated defense mechanisms into a way to avoid hearing bad news. Then, we think, we don’t have to deal with it. The opposite is true, however. Only when we can hear and consider information can we handle it.
Habit Over time, many people develop the habit of thinking ahead during conversations. Thinking ahead is valuable in most aspects of life, but it’s deadly when you need to be listening. Like all behaviors that have become habits, changing this one is not easy. Reminding yourself to refocus on the speaker can help.