SCHOOL IS DIFFERENT FROM PRESCHOOL
Starting school is a major transition in the lives of children and their families, an event full of challenges even when the teachers do a great deal to ease everyone into the new setting and situation. For Mia, the transition was a little easier because she didn’t have to change child care arrangements. Family child care programs usu- ally have mixed age groups and provide what is sometimes called “surround care” or before- and after-school care. Children who are leaving home for the first time, as well as those four- and five-year-olds in early care and education programs who have “graduated” into kindergarten, face a whole new program both in kindergarten and in surround care. Those children have a tremendous transition to deal with.
Think about the kinds of ways that teachers and school-age care staff can help parents and their children feel more comfortable. In Daniel’s case, the kindergar- ten teacher had an orientation the week before for new children and their families. They saw the classroom, tried out the desks, learned where things were, and how the schedule worked. The stories of both Daniel and Mia are true; unfortunately,
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neither child entered a family- centered school. Let’s imagine now that the kindergarten, at least, was family-centered. In a family-centered school, how might the children and their families have been more pre- pared for this big step forward?
A Family-Centered Approach to Kindergarten In a family-centered program the teacher sees the importance of creat- ing a relationship with each family, so instead of one big orientation, he or she meets with each family individu- ally or in small groups over a period of time. Some families might even have a home visit before school starts.
In a family-centered program, the relationship starts even earlier than the first meeting before the start of the new school year. Teachers often send out invitations to families, encouraging them to visit the program in action before the end of the last school year. Some families accept the invitation. Some also get to spend time in the school-age child care center at the school.
At first meetings, there are always forms to fill out. But in a family-centered pro- gram, completing school forms is not the main purpose of the meeting. Teachers often send out forms ahead, and many families bring the form to the meeting al- ready filled out. The purpose of the first meeting is for teachers and families to make connections with each other. Figure 5.1 illustrates a sample of the kind of form that helps get connections started.
In families where either the child or the parents are worried about separation, the subject is discussed. Parents’ feelings about separation are acknowledged, and the teacher, the parents, and the child all brainstorm together about how to ease the separation fears. Teachers know what a big step it is to send children to school for the first time—even for those parents who have had previous experience with early care and education programs.
Family-centered programs try to stagger the entry so all children don’t start at the same time. That’s not always possible, but when it is, it helps children ease in. Together with the teacher the family decides if a family member should come in and stay with the child until he is comfortable, or if it is best that family members stay out of the classroom until the child gets used to being there on his own.
The School-Age Child and Stages of Development Starting “real school” comes at a time when children’s development is in transition—they are growing out of one stage of development and into another. The change of stages doesn’t come at the same age for every child, and it is highly unlikely that this is the first transition phase of a child’s life. Children starting kindergarten have already moved through Erikson’s first stage, where trust is the major focus. That transition happens during the first year, more or less. Children,
Starting school is a major transition in the lives of children and their families; it can be quite an adjustment
Working with Families of School-Age Children 101
even those who have satisfactorily developed a basic sense of trust in that first year of life, still have trust issues when they start kindergarten. How much those issues dominate their lives depends on how they resolved what Erikson saw as that first psycho-social conflict all children go through. These children have also moved through Erikson’s second stage—that of autonomy, as they have worked on resolv- ing the issues involved with developing an identity that gives them the ability to see themselves as separate people with wants, likes, and the power to say no. Erikson’s third stage, the stage of initiative, occurs during what some call the “play years.” It usually starts around the age of three and ends around six. That means most children are still in the stage of initiative when they enter kindergarten.